How to build EXTRAordinary relationships
When I crated the Tagline: Be the Boss of your health; BOSS stands for: Beyond ordinary self-care strategies. Ordinary is obvious: eat well, exercise, sleep. Beyond ordinary means looking deeper at what kind of food to eat, how to find what works for our bodies, finding what truly custom solutions are available.
A big part of my personal journey towards vibrant health meant repairing or letting go of some relationships.
Let’s have a look at the types of relationships we all have in our lives, and how we can make them EXTRAordinary
1. Outer circle: people who you come in contact with once or twice. A cashier in a supermarket, a greet vendor, bus driver…. What kind of energy are you putting out throughout the day? How do you present yourself? Do you make an effort to put a smile on that stranger’s face? What if that random stranger is a celebrity undercover, someone who is meant to make a radical positive shift in your life or someone who needs your help or a simple smile? You don’t want to have regrets about missed opportunities.I once heard a story about this poor old man who kept praying to win the lottery. Every single day he was asking the higher power to send him a winning ticket. Finally his guardian angel felt so sorry for the old man, and he went to God and said: “please take pity on this old man, he’s had a hard life.” And God answered: “I’d be happy to, if only the old man would buy a ticket.”
So what if this is the same: we are going through life, desiring more connections, a job promotion, more money in our bank account. Can random strangers become friends? Sometimes. Some people are meant to pass by for a second, some are meant to stay for eternity.
2. Inner circle: our family, friends, coworkers or people that we have almost daily interactions with. What does that interaction look like? Are we accepting and non-judgmental? Do we take things personally?
One of my favorite books is “The four agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz. I actually had the privilege of meeting his son, Don Jose.
“Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally… Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves,” – when I read this, something has shifted in me.
I used to take on other people’s feelings or actions towards me, thinking it was personal. But looking at the bigger picture means staying true to yourself and just sending people love. They don’t mean to say hurtful things. When they do, it’s coming from a place of pain or anger, or hurt. It’s not personal.
Think about these people and forgive them.
“If others tell us something we make assumptions, and if they don’t tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate,” – The Four Agreements
We barely take time to truly and authentically connect to ourselves, to listen to our bodies (I talk about this in my book “Cravings Boss”), our hearts, out intuition.
Can you just imagine the possibility of being able to understand your own needs and tend to them guilt-free.One of the ways to connect deeper is meditation. You don’t need to do much, just some deep breathing to start. I’ve seen so much research on what it does to the brain, and with consistent practice the results are remarkable.I like to do 2-3 mini check-ins throughout the day, just asking myself how I feel and what I need to feel more energized.
Remember that your best self can show up in every relationship:)